I love this baby girl. I really do. Even when she is shoved up against my bladder just chillin' with her hand over her forehead like in this picture. I tend to whine about the way she makes me feel physically but amidst all the fatigue and sickness I can't help but imagine her tiny face looking up at me. I see her in my dreams all the time (she's really really cute) and I can almost sense her cheek against mine, holding her close with my arm under her little bum. I think the love will be overwhelming. She is already teaching me a lot of patience...reminding me I can't do it all and still feel like myself. She better be a good eater cause I am really only eating to sustain her these days as food has become a major turnoff for me. I have gotten pretty used to just feeling sick most of the time and having a never ending headache. And I don't know what it is, but most mornings I practically pass out...as in faint. Its kind of inconvenient if I am somewhere public, like at the grocery store, where there really isn't anywhere to just sit down and put your head between your legs. So I end up just having to sit on the ground momentarily or if I am lucky I will find a little step stool or something used my employees for stocking shelves. Its fantastic. I have met women who absolutely love being pregnant and I just kind of look at them with a confused slash intrigued sort of look, which combined on my face probably just makes me look crazy (or makes them think I think they are crazy, which they are probably right on with that), but I really do wish that were me. I think I will just stick to the dream of having her outside the womb and loving that instead:)
Don't worry--pregnancy flies by. I had black-out sessions, too. It's scary, but somehow you forget all the crappiness of pregnancy once it's through. Or at least there are other things to occupy your thoughts:).
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